When most people think of the scariest thing that could possibly happen on the road, they think of that scene from Final Destination 2. But those people are dead wrong – because there are far greater threats to your livelihood than a little runaway timber.
If you have spent any time on Reddit, car groups on Facebook, or pretty much anywhere else on the internet, it’s likely you’ve heard of BAE. But what does BAE mean? BAE stands for “Big Altima Energy”, which unlike “BDE”, isn’t a good thing. But what is Big Altima Energy? A situation you have likely witnessed yourself far too many times. Big Altima Energy is a stereotype that most Nissan Altima drivers are belligerent cunts on the road, and a danger to everyone except for themselves by some luck.
You know when you’re driving down the road and all the sudden a car is swerving in between lanes and speeding and just all around a bad driver. Yeah it was probably someone in a Nissan Altima.
big – aal·tuh·muh – eh·nr·jee
Where did “BAE” originate?
The term originated on the Facebook group “Big Altima Energy”. This group has over 225k members, and is filled with dozens of posts every day that explain the term better than any definition will.
As many of the groups members will say…you can’t make this shit up, it just sorta naturally happens on its own. Unfortunately, BAE makes its drivers impervious to natural selection, thanks to the vehicles shield of pure chaos energy. Guardrails, parking tickets, and lane markings all seem to have no effect on its armor, and only strengthen its resolve.
In Conclusion
Steer clear of these fuckers, they will wreck your day without a second thought. If you do happen to cross paths with one – follow these 3 steps:
1. Don’t make eye contact (it has a chance to enrage them).
2. Keep your distance
3. Do NOT pass, overtake, or merge less than 300yds ahead
If you follow these three steps, you have a pretty good chance of surviving your next encounter with BAE. Just remember, be prepared for anything, as encounters can often be unpredictable, and may end up with you reporting a hit-and-run to your insurance or worse, having to meet the driver face-to-face.
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